The Bird: Did you just call me a gerbil?
The Boyfriend: No, I called you a jerkoff!
The Bird: Phew! I thought for a minute you had something against gerbils!
Last night I dreamed that Lenin has risen from the dead and was in New York to do some shopping and, y'know, hang. We took him to see the Radio City Christmas Spectacular. After the show, he confessed that he'd found it "only ok" and asked if The Little Mermaid was still sold out.
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